11 March 2010

dont worry i'm fine

its getting a little difficult to breathe today, i dont know why. after beating in some abnormally fast rate, my heart started to ache a little. after few hours, the suffocation is back with my heart aching again and i have to stretch myself to get a really deep breath to make sure i am breathing in some air into my lungs. man, what a freakening thing. i understand i may not be very young now but after all i'm not that old for a worn out heart. really hope it is just some normal thing and does not mean anything. ya, that should be it, i'm fine. very fine.

04 March 2010

here he comes...

since weekend i've been waiting and in another 11+ hours, here he comes and here i go.....

***** fingers crossed *****

***** pray hard *****

***** all the best to me *****


27 February 2010

been so long...


two days ago was the release of STPM result. wow, so many years back since i've taken mine. during my time, i didn't fancy that moment. who would when the results came out to be a disappointment. thank god, its over now and i've recover from that yucky feelings. but not long from now, i will soon be hit with another disappointment. aah!!!! please, dont let that to happen. i rather it that kinda of news where it turns out to be good news when i've prepared for the worst. that feeling is great. just like the one felt by tim urban and alex lambert during their elimination rounds. they thought they would be bidding goodbyes but how fortunate its not their time yet. but if they still fail to prove themselves next week, well most probably the banana is stolen before it gets ripen. anyhow, personally i hope jermaine seller gets eliminated as soon as possible. i dislike him the most, he somehow irritates me a lot.

23 February 2010

oh!

with my milo ice beside me in a hot midnight although the rain just poured, i am sitting facing my laptop again to blog about pai ti kong.

before i laid my fingers on the keyboard, i took a sip of my i-believe-very-yummilicious-milo that i just made specially for myself.

with very high expectation of my skill in making milo ice, my tiny sepet eyes grew bigger as the drink was swallowed and the taste was detected by my taste buds on my tongue and interpreted by my brain.

holy s***!!!!!


SALTY??!!!


WHAT???!!!!


it turned out salty????


i was in real shock. apa ni? quickly i refreshed and gosh, that crytal looking solids i poured which i thought was sugar suddenly became clear to my brain it was salt. adeh! my yummilicious milo became salty milo ice. *sigh


i begin with my first sip and now i seal it with last gulp of my salty milo ice. it tasted not bad but let it remained as the first and last.




pai ti kong will be posted other day. i'm kinda still in a shock.





21 February 2010

i dont know what is this

to xx,



if only i have the courage to tell you how much i miss you, i would be email this to you instead of blogging here. but come to think of it, its not that i do not have the courage cause courage is not what it takes. for me, i dont find it a problem to say it out what i feel but the point is why would i wanna let you know when i know letting you know will not make a difference. and how do i know i know that? cause i told you so before and i know too that its not me that you want to hear it from.. therefore, from then on, i choose to keep everything concerns bout you in my heart instead of bullshitting to you. this is why this is not found in your inbox but my blog.

20 February 2010

cny

when cny comes, it is all about red, gathering, food, angpaus, poker cards, mahjong, visiting and cny songs. if its not merry, loud and full of laughters, it is not cny. and what makes all these to happen??? gambling! yes, gambling is something you must do dur cny. it is like a package where it includes visiting, gathering, poker cards/ mahjong and angpaus. so fun, so exciting and so risky as you may not know you will lose all your angpaus money or add up to it.


i still remember how i spent my cny gambling almost every year. from 10 cents, 20 cents bet to 50 cents, 1 ringgit note and slowly increase and increase to 2, 3, 5 and now to 10 and 20. it was real crazy how the notes look like waste paper when it comes to gambling.


yesterday was the peak of cny this year for now. initially it was a visiting to my uncles's house before heading home but it turned out to be a gambling day. i was a little reluctant since i've won after gambling from day1 of cny till day5. its smtg uncommon cause i was known of donating almost every year. but c'mon it cny! besides, usually in cny my family will played dank (i dont know the exact term but it sounds that way. thats what we called it. its a card game something similar to baccarat) this year even though every night is gambling night, from black jack to mahjong and rummy but we had not play dank yet. so, i took my seat and settled down with my initial small bet.


now thinking back, no wonder i was winning cause i was playing other games. dank is the game i played and lost almost every year. its too late to realise, as i played, i wasnt aware how much i actually lost until i refused to take out another 50 ringgit note. unlike mahjong and rummy besides luck, you need skill. but for dank, its like black jack, more to luck than skill. and the winning losing activity was way faster than those skilled games which was why i wasnt noticing i actually lost up to three figures. i was like 'wah, wa su a ni ceh lui liao'.


what to do...so i took a late lunch break while the rest still busy betting.


after a break from my refusal of taking another 50 note, i was back to play since it supposed to be the last 3 rounds. but banker's pile of 50 notes getting higher and higher, making his win up to four figures. the atmosphere was getting tenser and hotter. almost all the players were losing with me at the bottom of the top loser list. so our going home early plan was postponed and the gambling session continued.


but my weird superstitious funny aunt disallowed me to play. according to her, the additional players caused her to lose so she asked me to bet on her bet. so, i was like okay since she convinced me that her spot was very 'ong'. after 2 rounds, my 50 note gone, left only red notes. i was like, 'tua ee ah, lu u pian wa bo. ko kong lu eh ui ong. wa eh lui si ka ceng hu cuik tui lai eh.'


with not much hope, standing and watching them playing, suddenly there's a twist of luck. it was a right choice to make a comeback. every rounds, i would grab two red notes from her and the best thing was it was continuousssssss. oh my, it felt so GOOD!!!!!!


not too long, the money i lost was back to me. in fact i was now winning a little. AWESOME!!!!!! thanks to my aunt. it wouldnt be that fast and easy if i was the one playing.


around half an hour, the banker called it off after no longer bear distributing most of his winning notes. and so we kuai kuai got ourselves ready to continue our journey back home. all well ends well =)


happy chinese new year people!!!!!


*happy birthday bro and belated birthday to sp and ej!

29 January 2010

no more ROS

friday 29th - my last day of ros [hooray!]

ya, so its my last day of ros and its also the day i did team teaching biology with my partner. after this, my practical will be officially start next week. unfortunately, biology teachers are more than enough in the school so no choice but to teach science.

back to team teaching... how terrible, it was such a rush. everything's so last minute. incomplete lesson plan, not detailed content, insufficient worksheet, questions were way to easy and no rehearsal. my slides that going to present to the students were completed only like 20 minutes before the lesson started. ya, 20 minutes and i was still at home, in my pajamas which i suppose to be in school preparing and stuff. how awful. i managed to get quick bath, simply grab baju kurung from the piles of unwashed clothes and most terrible was that i didnt even have sufficient time to brush my teeth. ewww...i wonder did those boys realise the natural smell when i walked past them.

anyhow, thank goodness, no marks was given for this observation even though the teachers gave us compliments over the activities we carried out. at least we did not make ourselves look silly. well, i guess they did see potentials in us especially me. haha!

alright, last minute thing and those unprepared stuff are so not gonna happen when i begin to teach next week (is that so??). now, i kinda pity my students despite they made me shout every moments i entered the class. oh my god, bless me and my students. hopefully they wont flunk their monthly test next month and mid year examination. hopefully they dont go crazy too when i'm observed by my supervisor. or else i'll make them run around the field, sun them, clean my car and bla bla bla.... ah, fun!

03 January 2010

hello 2010

this post is merely to welcome 2010. how 'mo liu', ya i know but its still something to cheer about cause its once a year event. hurray!!!!!

may be a little too late HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!



a new year but same old wish = world peace and harmony